Fear is a protective device to save myself from the fantasy of hurt.
What a terrific new understanding of fear. Of course it’s a protective device, it doesn’t allow you to proceed. And it works without exception, perfectly well.
When you were little it was easy for adults who were much larger and who had strong voices, to overpower you, to frighten you. That’s a fact. You were truly frightened. And you spent a lot of time “little.” And so … the overpowering pressed onto you and in to you. The impression of fear onto you is still there and on automatic and is automatically protecting you from faultily anticipated hurt.
Perhaps you spoke up and were reprimanded into silence. Perhaps you spoke up and you were shouted and raged into silence. Perhaps the other person’s response to your speaking up was fear or agitation and then you got scared. Maybe you witnessed your brother or sister getting yelled at or worse, hit. It was likely very scary. You may have first felt fear way before that. Fear at some point became your reliable companion.
If today you are in an abusive relationship, allow your fear to propel you to take action (call a friend to help, see a counselor etc.) to remove yourself to safety.
Otherwise, recognize your fear as an old friend protecting you when today you no longer need that protection. Because you feel fear as you did so many times in the past, you have been concluding that you must be in danger. Always rule out the reality of the danger.
Notice NOW that you are not in any danger.
Relax into this realization.
Sit back and allow yourself to transform.